Nerves

Nerves can be such a drag. Personally, I hate them. Some performers can use nerves, turning them into adrenaline, which helps boost their performance. I was the complete opposite. I had varying degrees of nervousness depending on the situation. Somedays I'd get dry mouth, other days I'd shake, while other days I would not be able to move or say anything because my whole body felt paralysed. I have been performing professionally now for many years, and still get nervous. I used to find shame in this, trying to hide my fears the best I could.

Being on stage has never been challenging. It's always right before an audition or just before I step out on stage/set that does it, but once I start performing, I'm absolutely fine.


Now that I'm older, and more experienced, I am able to talk about this ongoing battle. Being in an industry where 90 percent of the time you are rejected can be extremely taxing on the soul, and can play with your self esteem. Nerves can develop for various reasons, however they all stem from the same place...the mind. I remember the day someone told me, the reason I am nervous is because I care so much. I carry this helpful piece of information with me to every casting, and every job. This person has helped me conquer step one of my battle, but what about my self conscious mind that tries to put negative thoughts into my head saying, "You're not the best. What if they hate your song? They're going to be bored. You are going to mess up your words. There are prettier girls." My biggest task of all is to silence these voices, and find my inner cheerleader.

The day this all turned around for me, was the day I read about Barbara Streisand and her stage fright. To learn that such a talent and superstar like Barbara Streisand had stage fright, made me feel more human, and less like a failure. I thought, if she can do it, so can I.

After my Barbara Streisand revelation, I was uplifted by more stories. Meryl Streep would throw up before filming a movie. Amy Adams feels paralysed before a performance. Adele suffers from anxiety on tour and has even puked on someone.

Everyone of these performers have discovered their personal way of coping, and I have found mine through meditation, deep breathing, internal self praise, and self belief. Once I relax, it's game time! I am not cured, and most likely will never be, however I can manage my nerves which to me is a win.

If you suffer from nerves or stage fright, don't be ashamed. It's absolutely normal and should not define your capabilities as a performer. The only way to conquer your fears are to face them dead on...so speak up, and don't give up! You are enough!